A Journey of Grief, Love, and Healing Through Ceramics

My Dad’s Urn: The Piece That Tested Both My Skills and Heart

Some pieces go beyond technical challenges—they carry an emotional weight that makes them difficult to create. The most challenging piece I’ve ever made was my dad’s urn. It wasn’t just the size or the complexity of the design that made it difficult; it was the emotional significance behind it.

After my father passed away, I didn’t want my mom to have an urn that felt impersonal or disconnected from the man he was and is, living on in our hearts. I wanted it to reflect the love we have for him, so I set out to make something special. It took me weeks to even start. It was hard to accept that I was making a piece to hold his ashes and not be able to hold his hand. .

The Technical Challenges

I had never made an urn before, and the size alone was intimidating. It needed to be large enough to hold both my dad’s ashes and a vase that would fit inside. The vase was an important detail for me because my dad used to bring my mom flowers. I wanted the urn to symbolize that connection.

The hardest part was getting the vase to fit inside the urn—this was something I had never done before, and it took a lot of trial and error. Technically, it pushed my skills as a ceramic artist in ways I hadn’t anticipated.

The Emotional Journey

Emotionally, this piece was unlike anything I’d ever made. I cried often while working on it. Losing my dad had been so tragic and recent—less than a month had passed. Crafting his urn felt like I was pouring all my grief into clay. Each step, from shaping the form to adding the cross on the front, felt heavy but meaningful. It was a way for me to process what had happened, even though it was incredibly painful.

Lessons Learned

Through this experience, I learned that some pieces can be emotionally draining, and that’s okay. My dad’s urn is the hardest piece I’ve ever made, not just because of the technical aspects, but because of the emotional weight I carried with me throughout the process. It taught me that creating art can be healing, but it can also require a lot from you emotionally.

Looking Ahead

I hope that one day I’ll be able to make urns for others who have lost a loved one. It’s a deeply personal and emotional piece to create, but I know firsthand how meaningful it can be to have something handmade, something that reflects the person you’ve lost.